Time is beautiful to me.

For me, Mondays are usually full of resolve of energy. I'm usually up on Mondays before my kids--sometimes I manage to either exercise or read my scriptures or even do BOTH by the time I wake my kids up. By Friday I'm pretty much crawling across the finish line. On Friday, my kids are often driven to school by a mother who's slouching behind the steering wheel so no one can see her pajamas. I need to work on finishing the week well. But today is Monday so I feel like I CAN change and improve and be better. So because of some great reminders I've recently had about time, I want to focus today on trying to use my time more effectively.

Elaine Dalton said in the recent CES fireside that our time is one of three gifts given to us by a loving Heavenly Father.

Julie Beck talked about time on Saturday night to all the women in the church. She said, "One of the most precious commodities we all have is time. Most women have many responsibilities and never have sufficient time to do everything their hearts and minds want to do." She then quoted President Dieter F. Uchtdorf who said that, "true wisdom in life consists of the elimination of non-essentials. What are the non-essential things that clutter your days and steal your time? What are the habits you may have developed that do not serve a useful purpose? What are the unfinished or unstarted things that could add vigor, meaning and joy to your life?"

I think today I won't spend any (more) time on this:

I will use my time to take care of myself with this:

and

(this is obviously NOT what I look like while exercising)

I will use my time to do more for them:

And I know some families who are unemployed right now. I think I will take them dinner or maybe just some of this:

That's how I will use my (beautiful) time today.

Quinoa salad

Expecting outrage from my children and comments about being forced to eat third world country food from my husband, I made this beautiful salad for dinner. I'd never tried quinoa but I'd heard about it at every food storage enrichment class I've ever attended. Quinoa is a supergrain that's high in protein but relatively low in carbs for a grain. So this is what I made and it was so good! I did get the expected reaction from my kids but Ron was completely open-minded and said he liked it. The recipe is at epicurious.com and its called Black Bean and Tomato Quinoa. This salad was beautiful to me because it was healthy and colorful and tasted great!

Joseph and Gracie playing "Trek"

So my stake had a "Trek" this summer for the teenagers. For those of you that don't know, that's where they dress up like pioneers and act out the pioneer trek across the plains so they can learn lessons about endurance, faith, obedience, etc. Ron helped with planning of the event, so he recently received a copy of the "Trek" DVD. There are lots of pictures on the cover of the DVD and Joseph has been really interested in it. He was particularly interested in the mock rifles the boys were holding in some of the pictures. So this morning Joseph decided to make a "rifle" with a 3-foot tall wooden dowel that we have. He used cardboard and duct tape to widen one end and it really does look like a rifle (or is it a musket--I have no clue what the correct term for the weapon is). Gracie's rifle was a tennis racket. They went into the backyard and pulled our wheelbarrow around as their handcart. They would periodically stop and shoot things with their "rifles." They would also stop and sing songs (Gracie's "rifle" turned into a guitar at this point) while Gracie ran around the handcart in a circle. Joseph insisted that she had to run because "thats what the pioneers did while they sang songs." The song they song was Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire" which they recently picked up from a friend of theirs. I stopped what I was doing to watch all of this and of course, as their mother, I thought it was so cute and funny and beautiful. Kids playing together nicely and using their imaginations is something that is beautiful to me.

Beautiful to me because

My Dad passed away this summer--June 24th to be exact. I love him and I miss him to the point of tears almost daily. His loss is painful to me--bitterly painful. He was 59 and my youngest brother is 18. I'm 34 years old and the oldest of 7 children. He died of a heart attack as he was packing his car to come join us. We (my Mom, 3 of my siblings, 2 in-law siblings, my 4 children and their 3 cousins) were camping on the Oregon Coast when we received the news. It was raining. Dad was going to drive to meet us that day and we were going to meet up with my Mom's parents, brothers and sisters, and nieces and nephews the following day at one of our awesome family reunions. Instead, we returned in complete shock for 7 hours to my parents' home in a slow, sad, 3-car caravan.

I decided to start using this blog as a place I can keep track of things that I think are truly beautiful. Crassness and vulgarity are everywhere and often rule in our culture's media and entertainment. I often witness or hear about people who treat others cruelly--their outward acts evidence of ugliness on the inside. I'm on the lookout for things that are "virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy" (The Articles of Faith, 13) to me. I'm hoping that as I do this regularly, I will be able to be a more positive person and not feel overwhelmed by the negative that is ever-prevalent in our society. I'm also hoping that I don't sound preachy or self-righteous to anyone--this is something I just need to do for me.

As I mentioned, this picture of my husband, our 4 children, and me in front of my father's casket is beautiful to me. Is that strange, morbid, or just plain wrong? Let me explain: this picture reminds me of what I discovered this summer amidst the bitterness of my father's sudden death.

First, I learned that my family--immediate and extended--is my sweetest and most beautiful blessing.

Second, I learned in a new and deeper way that the gospel of Jesus Christ is truly a precious and beautiful gift from a loving Heavenly Father. Before this summer, the whole "we must pass through bad times to appreciate the good times" was just a cliche to me. For me, this was a truth that had to be understood experientially. Passing through this difficulty this summer made me appreciate more the knowledge that I have--that is amply taught in the scriptures--that Jesus Christ lived, died and was resurrected so that we can be resurrected as well. I am more grateful after this summer for the doctrine I've always been taught and that has been taught by prophets--that death is not the end of our existence.

A third thing that was truly beautiful and sweet to me this summer is the service that was given to our family after my father's passing. I mentioned our 7-hour car ride home from the place we were camping. By the time we arrived at home, members of our church congregation had come to my parent's home, mowed the lawn, cleaned the house completely, stocked the fridge and prepared a meal for that evening. Our extended family and my Mom's ward family continued their service in the days and weeks following my Dad's death. One person that performed this service said that he mowed the lawn, "because he just had to do something." I felt like the people who helped us were sharing our burden and mourning with us. It was a truly beautiful experience to be served so completely at our family's time of need.

So that is why this picture is beautiful to me. I still miss my Dad every day. But I have more sweetness and beauty in my life because I've become aware of what's really important and valuable to me. Does that make sense?